I am paid $25 dollars to participate in a research study

 

Remove my uterus to put in a Mr. Coffee or a checkbook or a bottle of laundry detergent, something a bit more useful

 

“What actions can bisexual women take to protect themselves?” I leave with cash in an envelope and cheese crackers

 

Lacey pretending to drink white wine so we won’t know she’s pregnant at my grandpa’s funeral

 

“No, I am not interested in discussing birth control today”

 

Sofia has 3, Kendra has 2 with another on the way, Lacey not far behind. Gina and Samantha and Courtney and Paula waiting in the wings while I stay in the audience

 

They drink sherbet punch and mocktails, I drink coffee because I can. My hands become too jittery for Pin the Diaper on the Baby

 

They are teachers and librarians and online boutique owners and freelance organizational experts and wives wives wives. I am trying to catch up I promise

 

Eating macaroni and cheese for the third night in a row, I wonder if my roommate is scared of me

 

I crochet infinite baby blankets, pastel blue and pink and purple yarn choking me

 

My mother will not share that part of me with my aunt or grandma. There is simply too much going on

 

Embarrassed about my narcissistic writing, I still appear in every poem. Bukowski and Sappho both look down in shame

 

My virginity somewhere in the stratosphere, “I didn’t know it was serious”

 

Buzzed neck and braless nipples both a call to action and white flag

 

Hank and Louis snuggled against my breasts, motherhood by proxy

 

Through the fog it is hard to tell if the lighthouse beacon is on or not. I do not know if I am the keeper or the sailor

 

I spend the $25 on groceries, my sexuality pays for my granola and milk and tea

 

*

 

Frannie Comstock is a poetess/comedienne/whatever-the-patronizing-feminine-version-of-writer-is. She currently resides in Ohio, pursuing a degree or two at Miami University. You can find her on Twitter @trophyuncle.

 

Rebecca Peloquin is an all purpose artist and the founder of micro-publishing company Repel Industries. Originally from very rural Massachusetts, she lives in Los Angeles with her person and her extremely lazy pitbull, where she can almost always be found working on photos, drinking coffee and eating sandwiches. You can find her on Instagram @rebeccapeloquin.

 

Thursday, August 16th 2018